A trans man is calling for urgent changes to bathroom access and safety after he was allegedly subjected to a humiliating and discriminatory experience at a popular Melbourne restaurant.
Zee Pepper, a proud Gunai Kurnai man, had been enjoying a night out at Soho restaurant with his mother and stepsister before the trio headed to a theatre show. But what began as a relaxed evening quickly took a distressing turn.
Speaking to Star Observer, Pepper recounted choosing to use a unisex bathroom, rather than the men’s, due to previous unsafe experiences in single-gender facilities. The toilet was unmarked as accessible but was labelled ‘Unisex’, and was an ambulant bathroom typically used by people with disability.
🗣️ “I quietly and politely said I was trans…”
As Pepper went to enter the unisex bathroom, he was physically blocked by a man identifying as the venue’s manager.
“He was very overpowering and was demanding that I use the male toilets,” Pepper said. “I quietly and politely said to him that I am trans and that I don’t feel safe to use the male toilets at this time, and that I do have a right to use the unisex ambulant toilet. He responded by laughing in my face, saying he doesn’t care, and pointing and demanding I use the males.”
“At that point I became visibly upset and angry. I asked him, ‘are you mocking me for being trans?’ We went back and forth — him stating I need to use the males, me saying I felt unsafe.”
Pepper alleges the manager then barricaded the bathroom door with two posts and told him: “There, now you can’t use it at all,” before walking away.
“The demeanour and tone used was extremely arrogant and it was blatantly obvious that he did not care.”
Pepper said the incident left him feeling unsafe, humiliated and unsupported by venue staff. “I am extremely disappointed with his actions and lack of support from other venue staff, and I felt demoralised as a person.”
🏳️⚧️ “It was clearly discriminatory”
The following day, Pepper shared his experience via Instagram, calling out the behaviour as transphobic and calling for improved access to safe bathrooms.
“I’m not normally someone who tends to make a fuss… but this particular incident was disgusting on so many levels and was clearly discriminatory.”
The post received nearly 500 comments, with many expressing solidarity and recounting similar experiences.
“Cripple here. I would much prefer my trans friends (and friends I haven’t met just yet) use the accessible bathroom and remain safe. As another group that often is discriminated against, most of us know that rights aren’t pie,” one user commented.
Many took further action by reporting the venue and leaving negative reviews online. In response, Soho disabled comments on their Instagram page but began receiving numerous one-star Google reviews criticising their staff’s conduct.
Pepper said Soho eventually reached out via Instagram requesting his phone number, but he declined, explaining he wasn’t in the right headspace.
“They replied with a pretty textbook response about being an inclusive venue and offered to make a donation to a charity of my choice. But there was no discussion of accountability or consequences for the staff member involved.”
Soho later posted a brief apology on Instagram Stories, claiming to be a “safe space”, though did not outline how this would be achieved.
Pride Month Starts with Pain
Pepper described the experience as “a shocking way to start Pride Month”.
“The world is not a very kind place at the moment, especially for a trans Aboriginal man straddling these two marginalised identities,” he said.
“Now, more than ever, it’s important for venues to start making toilets accessible for trans and gender diverse people. I don’t want to be taking up space from someone who needs an accessible toilet, but I also want to feel safe using a public bathroom.”
⚠️ Rising Transphobia in Australia
Pepper’s experience adds to a growing number of transphobic incidents being reported across the country. While transphobia is more visibly politicised overseas, Australia is not immune — recent examples include the banning of gender-affirming care for minors in Queensland and increasingly hostile rhetoric from politicians.
“We are human beings trying to live our lives as our authentic selves in peace,” Pepper said. “We are already a vulnerable and marginalised community… People’s lives are genuinely at risk, and many have been lost to trans hate.”
