Former competitive hockey player Jesse Kortuem has publicly come out as gay, crediting the queer hockey-themed series Heated Rivalry for inspiring him to finally share his story.
Although Kortuem never made it to the NHL, he played defence and centre across various leagues throughout his life. For years, his deep love for the sport and fear of how coming out might impact team dynamics kept him silent.
“I know many closeted and gay men in the hockey world are being hit hard by Heated Rivalry’s success,” Kortuem told Out.
“Never in my life did I think something so positive and loving could come from such a masculine sport.”
He continued, “Today, I took the step to finally tell my hockey journey and my story. I’m beyond grateful for all the positive comments I’ve received from past teammates and high school teammates.”
Kortuem shared his full coming-out message alongside a powerful reflection on his years spent grappling with identity in a hyper-masculine environment. He recounted his early years growing up in Minnesota – known as the “State of Hockey” – where sport was ingrained into his identity from a young age.
“As a young teenager, I carried a weight that did not seem to fit into that world,” he wrote. “I loved the game, but I lived with a persistent fear. I wondered how I could be gay and still play such a tough and masculine sport.”
That fear led him to walk away from his high school hockey team at 17, unable to reconcile his sexuality with the culture of the locker room. Even after moving to major cities like New York and Atlanta and being out to many in his personal life, he still remained closeted within his adult hockey teams.
“I spent every week in a locker room with guys I respected, yet I still did not feel safe enough to tell them who I truly was,” he shared. “Even when the conversation turned to wives, families, or dating, I would quickly change the subject.”
Everything changed in 2017, when Kortuem decided on a whim to participate in the Sin City Classic – a major LGBTQ+ sports tournament in Las Vegas. It was there, playing with a team made up of gay players from across North America, that he finally felt a true sense of belonging.
“From that moment forward, my life has never been the same,” he said.
That experience, and the friendships built through gay hockey clubs such as Vancouver’s Cutting Edges and Toronto’s Misfits, gave him the courage to live authentically both on and off the ice. He recently took part in the Cutting Edges’ Winter Classic in Sun Peaks, British Columbia – an experience he described as profoundly affirming.
“Standing on the ice, wearing your jersey that represents both my sport and my community, felt like a bridge being built over a gap I had lived with for decades,” he wrote.
Now, Kortuem hopes that by sharing his journey, he can inspire other LGBTQ+ athletes still struggling in silence.
“To the athletes out there who are still in the closet or struggling to find their way — I want you to know that there is hope and you’re not alone. You will get through this, and it is going to be okay.”
