Heroes and Scream star Hayden Panettiere has come out as bisexual in her upcoming memoir.
After years of feeling “afraid” to speak openly about her sexuality, Panettiere shares that part of herself in This Is Me: A Reckoning, which is set to be released on May 19, according to an exclusive preview in Us Weekly.
“That’s something about me I was never able to share with the world, because it was just never the right time,” she told Us Weekly of her sexuality.
Panettiere said that earlier in her life and career, she often felt pressure to present a perfect image rather than simply be herself.
“It was either I was too young, and I was being forced to be perfect at all times. I was not encouraged to just be myself. Then came the period where it felt like people coming out, especially women, saying that they were bisexual or liked girls, was a fad.”
The actor said she worried that speaking honestly about being bisexual would be dismissed or misunderstood.
Panettiere added that she was “afraid” people might think she was “jumping on the bandwagon” if she came out publicly.
“I wanted to make sure that I really sat down and chose my words carefully and was able to tell my story in an honest way, that people understood,” she said. “On one hand, it’s sad that I had to wait till I was 36 years old to share that part of me, but better late than never, right?”
Speaking with Us Weekly, Panettiere said discussing her bisexuality marked the “first time I got to say it out loud.”
While she said she has never fallen in love with a woman, she shared that she has dated women in the past.
“It was scary, though, because there were paparazzi always waiting for me outside, to follow me everywhere,” she said. “I had very little privacy. I have dated women. I was much more into women even as a child than I was men.”
She added that, while she had explored her sexuality, the pressure of public scrutiny made it difficult to fully open herself up emotionally.
“I have explored it, but because I hadn’t shared this with anybody, I didn’t really have the courage to throw myself fully emotionally into it. Because then if I did fall in love, that wasn’t something that I wanted to ever have to hide.”
As well as discussing her bisexuality, Panettiere also speaks to Us Weekly about other revelations from her forthcoming memoir, including her experiences with a stalker and postpartum depression.
