Ask Agony Aunt Lisa: Is She Going to Yoga or Having an Affair?

BWNT23 Two upset teenage girls sitting on sofa indoors at home

Rainbow Counsellor Lisa Michelle is here to help with your problems.

Q A few weeks ago I discovered my partner has been lying to me about where she goes on Wednesday nights. She told me yoga, but I’ve since learned she doesn’t attend that class anymore. I haven’t said anything to her because I’m not sure I’m ready to hear about an affair. What shall I do?

A It seems natural to think the worst at times like this. Harder still would be saying goodbye to your partner each Wednesday night knowing she is lying about her destination. You definitely need to confront her about your new information – gently. The information may not be correct. It may be she attends yoga at a new location and hasn’t thought to mention it. Give her the benefit of the doubt and request a meeting. You may not like her response, but if she is having an affair then it’s better to find out sooner rather than later. Deep breaths…


Lisa Michelle is a Chaplain and Counsellor for the GLBT Community, working with both Rainbow Youth and OUTLine NZ as an independent consultant and also on the board of OUTLine. If you have an issue you would like Lisa to talk about in express, email and let her know at

 Article | Lisa Luke Michelle