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In our ever-evolving world, ‘Lesbian In The Wild’ Jessie Lewthwaite is meeting several new types of queer women, each with their own shiny label. Just don’t try and put that label on her.

Sitting across from my date, I listened diligently as she described the tiny home she would like to build, told me about her favourite thrift shop, and mentioned that she had tailored her own clothes for the evening.

I watched her flowing, red hair bounce as she explained that she currently lived in what was technically a barn and had a side hustle refurbishing vintage furniture.

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“Oh, wow, so you’re like a stereotype then?” I laughed, in my most attractive way. She only looked back blankly, obviously confused.

“Cottagecore!” I explained. “If only you had some indoor plants and could knit, you would be like the perfect cottage-core lesbian.”

At this point, she disclosed that she had roughly 48 house plants and did not knit, but did, in fact, crochet.

In other words, I had completely nailed it.

Those of us that grew up in the 90s and 00s (otherwise known as the “original L Word era”) will have a pretty solid understanding of the types of lesbians out there. We know, of course, of the butch-to-femme spectrum. But I am here to tell you that there have been several new types of queer women since Bette killed Jenny. (We all know it was Bette. Don’t play with me!)

Cottagecore is just one of these new types. Our ‘sisters of the cottage’ enjoy a simpler life; many have escaped their corporate jobs in cities to live on the outskirts of civilisation to grow their own food and reject grey minimalism. If you see a girl knitting, her glasses balancing on her nose while she rocks a vintage fit, you have found one.

Another new addition are the ‘Hey Mamas.’ The fuckbois walked so the Hey Mamas could run. A delightful mash of cultural appropriation and top energy, the Hey Mamas have taken catcalling and made it gay. With only the power of lip-biting, winking, and enough hand gesturing to make a

seasoned Italian jealous, the Hey Mama is coming for your girl. She is in your girl’s Instagram DMs right now, linking her to her TikTok thirst traps.

Have you met a queer girl that only wears black, thinks Dark Academia is the aesthetic, and doesn’t believe in astrology but has already looked up your star chart compatibility? You’ve got a Raven Lesbian on your hands. She’s e-girl meets goth and can do perfect winged eyeliner even when five drinks deep. Don’t play with this girl; she will hex you!

We have all seen a TikTok or Facebook Reel that shows different types of lesbians. I like to send them to my friends with the caption ‘lol dis you’. But let’s be honest, we have all known a lipstick lesbian that is unclockable, and a ‘stone butch’ who owns the biggest strap you have ever seen; types are nothing new, but the thing that I love about lesbian culture is how much we evolve and grow.

I love that we are in a lesbian culture era, but please stop @me with ‘golden retriever masc’ videos!

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