Dick Richards preaches abstinence… well, for the first date anyway.
Have you ever wondered why a fuckbuddy or a hook-up never turns into anything more? Let me ask you this: If your flesh-light or dildo could talk, would you strike up a conversation with it? I’m guessing not. What’s the correlation, you ask? It’s quite simple. It’s all about you and you getting off. It’s an act of sexual release and abandonment, and there’s no head connection – no pun intended.
So, I’m going to say something bold and a little controversial… don’t have sex on the first date.
If you’re looking for a serious relationship, I believe fucking on the first meet is a bad idea. When I say fucking, I’m also meaning ejaculating. An orgasm on the first meet is a big no-no IF you want a relationship.
Why, though? You may argue that sexual compatibility and chemistry are important – and you would be right! But you can find that out later; it doesn’t have to be on the first date. Let’s be honest, you’ll know if there’s sexual chemistry in the first ten minutes. Maybe you want to see in person what they’re packing. Well, there is time for that, and what’s wrong with a little mystery? I’m not being prudish or old school. I’m being real. An orgasm on the first meet is called a hook-up.
I’m not bad-mouthing hook-ups. They are great and have their place. But if you are serious about having a relationship, you’re going to have to do things differently. It seems obvious to say that dating and relationships are different to our casual sex encounters, yet our actions are often the same. Meet, then fuck.
Sex on the first date kills sexual tension and intrigue because after you’ve cum, that high of mystery and curiosity is gone. Think about all the hook-ups you’ve had. How often have you gone back for seconds a few days later? Even if you wanted to, the feeling is rarely mutual. It also creates an expectation of sex, and if after every meet there’s the end goal of squirting, then that sounds more like a hook-up to me. Not ‘doing it’ early also separates those guys who are pretending to be looking for a relationship from those who are. You know the ones – those guys on Tinder who say they’re wanting to date and have a relationship but are just looking for a human cum-rag! They’re the worst.
There’s that saying, “If you want different results, do not do the same thing.” Relationships are built on more than just sex. They’re built on connection, trust, communication, respect, honesty, and commonality, and you get to know those things by spending time with one another outside of the bedroom. Figure out what you want and be honest. A relationship isn’t exclusive of sex, but what I’ve found is that a hook-up is exclusive of a relationship. It’s harder to transition from a fuck-buddy to a boyfriend than it is from a new friend to a partner. Be patient. We live in a world where we can satiate all our needs with a few taps on our phones, but when it comes to something more meaningful, we need to learn to wait and let it grow – pun intended.