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Rainbow Counsellor Elijah Luke Michel is here to help with your problems:

My boyfriend is bisexual and asked recently if we could have a threesome with a girl. I didn’t mind at first, but now I’m wondering how it will work. I’m not attracted to women in the slightest, so how do I make sure I am fully included?

That’s certainly a fair question, and I’m sure you’re not alone in asking. I like the way you’re allowing your partner freedom in expressing his orientation within your relationship – kudos to you. How about asking him how he might envision your encounter? What would be benefi cial for him if it was the other way around? You never know – if you play it right you might end up enjoying it. You and the woman could be the bread in a boyfriend sandwich 😉

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I have been single for the past year and now I’m ready to start dating again. I was with my ex for 11 years, so I’m well out of the dating scene loop. Any advice?

Well done for taking the time needed to heal from your separation. If you’re now ready to reconnect, think about what kind of connection you’re after – a hook-up, a friend-with-benefits, something more stable and long-term – and access the appropriate resources. Grindr is great for casual or clandestine hook-ups in your local area. Dating NZ Singles is a new dating site for all sexual orientations. If you’re after the support of a professional agency to help match-make you – try Elite Singles, also open to all orientations. Remember you can always start a conversation with someone you meet in a caf. or out in town. Enjoy your new life!

Elijah Luke Michel works with the LGBT+ community as a chaplain and face-to-face counsellor at OUTLineNZ. If you have an issue you would like Elijah to talk about in express, email ask@gayexpress.co.nz.

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